This is a guest post by Isabel William
You know how you expect to be the most important person to your special someone? Well, maybe it’s time you first put yourself first, as the relationship you have with yourself is the most important one in the world. Loving yourself is crucial not only for the general state of our mind, but for our relationship with other people. See, if we learn to love ourselves, it will be easier to love other people. If it’s the other way around, it’s how the relationship with other people will manifest. One way of respecting yourself more is by actually working on yourself and improving all those small issues that you would like to change. And yes, change can be difficult, especially if it’s a change on yourself, but it can be very rewarding. These are the most important things that you can do to improve yourself in every possible way:
Pay attention to yourself
The person that should come first in your life is definitely you. That is why paying attention to yourself and actually listening to what you want and need is of the utmost importance. If you are in pain, try to determine the source of it. If you’re in desperate need for a change – try to figure out what it is and work to achieve it. This could be the need for a new relationship (more often than not it happens that we are unsatisfied with ourselves because we are unsatisfied with the person we are in a relationship with), a new town or city where you would like to live, or even a new job. Listen to yourself, and try to sort these issues out by yourself.
Diagnose the root of your problems
As already mentioned, you need to identify the source of all your problems and work on that. If you’re suffering from low self-esteem, try to think about the first moment when you experienced this uncomfortable feeling and why it made you like that. You need to trace back the lineage of your problem and go back to where it all started. If you need help in this department, you can always find a good psychologist and work with him – this is definitely not embarrassing and you have nothing to fear about, as they are there to help you become a better person, to yourself and others as well.
Be the change you want to see
Bear this in mind – it’s never too late for a change, and if you think that it is, then you definitely need to change your perspective (what an inception, right?) First of all, try to think about the thing you wish to change the most. For many people, this is their job, as most of us sometimes feel that we could express ourselves more doing a different job. Some, however, cannot find themselves in the whole creative process and they wish for a more static job, which is totally fine. If this is the case with you and you want to do a more desk- and numbers-oriented job, you can always try to obtain a diploma of accounting which will help you easily find a job in this profession. Moreover, if you’re unsatisfied with your current relationship, try to think what’s best for you. Breaking up with somebody is definitely hard and it’s a never pleasant thing, but if it’s what you actually want, it’s always best to put yourself first. This will not only make you happier, but it can save your partner in the long run as well.
It’s OK to be selfish from time to time. Even though we are constantly struggling with so many work-related tasks and deadlines, try to put them aside once the working day finishes. It doesn’t matter that you didn’t finish the project – go home, pour a bottle of wine and simply enjoy yourself. If you want to have a bubble bath, that’s also okay. This will definitely help you recharge your batteries, and if you turn off your phone for just a little while, you will see how much better you’ll be feeling.
Stand up for yourself
Even though any kind of retaliation once somebody hurts you with words will make the problem worse, it’s important to stand up for yourself from time to time. You might not be that kind of a person, but you really owe it to yourself. 2018 is all about empowerment, and you definitely need to empower yourself more often. This is something that many people never develop, but you don’t have to be one of them. Say what you want and what you feel in that specific moment, and never let others hurt you intentionally.
Read a book every day
You’ve probably heard of the “Amish Hour”, and since many people try to reinforce it in their lives, it surely has to be good, right? This is definitely something that you should try at least three times a week (if not every night). Once you turn off all of your gadgets, you can sit down, relax and read a good book. Reading at least one hour per day or night is definitely a good habit that you can develop. You can choose any type of books that you fancy –non-fiction books, business books, even novels.
Take up a new hobby
Try to think what your answer would be to the question “What’s your hobby?” If you have no answer, that certainly means that you have to take up one that will engage you and thus make you happier. If you, however, have a hobby and want to take a new one – go ahead. Don’t think of the lack of time you have on your hands as that is why hobbies are there – to indulge in them once you have time, either every day, once a week or even once a month. If it’s a new language that you want to learn, definitely go for it. You can always start with small steps, especially if it’s a language that you want to learn for your own pleasure (and not for your job).
The most important thing is to realize that we’ve only been given one chance at life, and we have to make the best of it. This means constant self-improvement, and living like there’s no tomorrow. This doesn’t mean that you have to quit your job tomorrow or don’t give your 110% at work, but that you definitely need to do more things for yourself.