How To Love A Job You Hate

Hey, we’ve all been there right? Slogging through another day at the office, bolstered by yet another cup of coffee and some juicy office gossip. I remember when my 9-5 had me completely frazzled and frustrated. I worked for an insensitive boss with questionable morals at a high-end dating service, and I spent hours at my desk working on the computer, a hot searing pain shooting up my arm from over use. Thoughts of going to lunch and just never coming back slithered through my head, but that wouldn’t be responsible now would it? Especially with such a low balance in my bank account, and a husband who would totally freak out. After all, I was working in Beverly Hills, in a beautiful office with a view. I had health insurance for God’s sake! I should be grateful.


Okay,  yes, I was grateful, and by most standards, the job was a damn cool one, working as a full time Cupid. Matchmaking was so unique… but still… I wasn’t as happy as I could be. Waking up to an alarm clock sucked, the high heels were killing me, and my thin frizzy hair did NOT like to be worn down and loose as my boss required. As the years passed I started to feel resentful of my boss taking four day weekends and coming in at noon while I ran the multi city enterprise for a fraction of the pay. Not that he didn’t deserve it, after all, it was HIS company, but I couldn’t help dreaming of working from home in my yoga pants, hair up in a clip and no makeup. 

I eventually did leave that job and start my own boutique matchmaking service. I’m thrilled to say that I now work in my yoga/sweat pants, or often in a bikini (it’s HOT where I live) I wake up when I want and set my own hours. I’m blissfully happy and often pinch myself to make sure it’s all true!

(If you want the whole story, I wrote all about how I did it in my memoir, Hearts On The Line.)

Even though I’m sooooooo much happier now than when I had a boss who was pulling my strings, I still become frustrated with a difficult client or wonder if there’s something else that I might do…

Affluent men can be demanding at times. When a client requests to ONLY be matched to women 20 years his junior with double D boobies, green eyes… and a dozen other non negotiables, I start to hyperventilate. I’m sure you can relate in your own job to impossible demands.

So how do we deal with the every day frustrations of dealing with clients. co-workers and bosses?

I find that two things work for me.

  1. Going into gratitude
  2. Asking how I can serve

I focus on bringing light, love and encouragement to my clients and really celebrating the “wins.” When I make a great match or I’m praised for my expert advice, I really take that in and enjoy it. I see myself as a light worker, illuminating the way for the singles of the world, holding that space for a loving relationship with not only their soul mate, but themselves.



I also regularly remind myself that there are some REALLY gruesome and brutal jobs out there that people are doing just to put food on the table and a roof over their heads.

For example:

The Sewer Men of Mumbai

In India, every day Mumbai produces enough sewage to fill 4,500 Olympic-size swimming pools. Despite the many modern comforts of Mumbai, the sewer system is outdated and is still cleaned by hand. At least once a year the manhole covers are removed and a worker is lowered down with only a helmet for protection. The worker then scoops out the sludge consisting of both human and industrial waste that has been collecting in the pipes. It is not uncommon for Indian sewer workers to become ill or die from the toxic fumes. Indian Parliament recently passed a law in an effort to improve these poor working conditions, but many are doubtful that the new measures will make a difference.



There’s also a job called “The Rat Killer” in India

Rat killers go out at night and kill over a thousand rats, beating them with a five foot long stick. Take a look at this guy, he picks up the dead rats with his toes before depositing them in a plastic bag. Arrghhhh!!!!




These are just two jobs I’m thankful not to have to do and I’m sure there are hundreds more. So, anytime I feel like whining, I’ll come back to this post and re-watch the guy in Mumbai lowered into the sewer to clean it with his bare hands!

Do you love or hate your job? Leave a comment below!